Your "Carry On" moment

[C C Csiders]

I've just remembered a "carry on" moment I had five years ago when we moved into our current house. We used to live in Chelmsford town centre, and it was very rare to see any birds in our back garden, apart from the odd starling, and if we were very lucky a blackbird may have paid a visit.

Anyway, we moved a bit further out of Chelmsford, and the place we moved into, and still live, has lots of trees in and around it, and a hufge lake at the bottom of the garden, in an adjoining property. Therefore, lots of new wildlife could be seen.

Looking out of my bedroom window I could see two birds in the garden next door which were a non-existant sight in our old property. Excitedly I shouted down to my wife:

"I've just seen a pair of great tits in next doors back garden"

She was none too impressed.

What are your "Carry On" moments.

 

[DTS]

When i was 18 I worked for a tour operator as a phone pleb.

I was booking a flight for an elderly German man to somewhere in Spain I think. He told me came over here after being captured in the war and went on for half an hour about how awful the war was.

At the end of the conversation he said he was delighted how cheap the flights were to which I replied.

"Yes - Monarch have had a real Blitz on prices"

I nearly died with embarrsement. :thump:

 

[Leeboy]

nearly every day in my office the same girl eats a particular piece of fruit to which she'll get some wag saying ' what an enormous pair ' to her

the blokes laugh

the girls sigh

 

[MK Shrimper]

This is how I live my life.

 

[Cricko2]

Not rearly a "Carry on" moment, more of an embarrassing one, so I hope you dont mind me adding it CCC.

Many years ago I had been dating this girl for about a year. I had never met her Family so's to speak...We did out own thing in those days we were "cool" of course. But she was a great Sh ag ( I think in retrospect that is maybe why it lasted a year). Anyway we eventually split up which wasnt an amicable breakup. However sometime later at TOTS I met this Girl an we started stepping out together. All is going well we get along and eventually she invites me back to her new flat she has just moved into to. At this point she has told me she has a sister of course, but I take it in the flow of chat.

So on our second or third date she invites me back to hers....The place is empty . We eventually make it to the bedroom , I spend the night . We are at it like Rabbits all night ..Next Morning she is up and about long b4 me..and I hear voices coming from I guess the Kitchen. Both of which I recognised...The debate is ...Oh who have you brought home and slept with, I heard you at it like cats and dogs when I came in .....Panic stricken I looked around for clothes to escape in ........To late In walks MY current Lady followed closely behind by her sister .What made it worse was my current lady was about 5 years younger.than the ex.....Now if ever the Term ... "I want the ground to open Up" is Apt......That was that moment .:eek:

 

[Stats]

Respect Cricko for doing both sisters albeit unknowing to the fact they were related.

That post is Slipperdukesq, are you 2 related?

 

[Xàbia Shrimper]

Just a couple of weeks ago I was talking to a not-entirely unattractive female for which I do some consultancy work. She'd phoned me about four times over the course of an hour with a set of queries; at the end of the last call she said that she was sorry for continuing to bother me to which I replied in all innocence: "You can bother me anytime." Cue silence at the other end.

 

[Cricko2]

Respect Cricko for doing both sisters albeit unknowing to the fact they were related.

That post is Slipperdukesq, are you 2 related?

I still speak to the older Sister these days ..and she still brings it up.


Related to Slipper.One isnt that common:D

 

[Interpol Shrimper]

Not rearly a "Carry on" moment, more of an embarrassing one, so I hope you dont mind me adding it CCC.

Many years ago I had been dating this girl for about a year. I had never met her Family so's to speak...We did out own thing in those days we were "cool" of course. But she was a great Sh ag ( I think in retrospect that is maybe why it lasted a year). Anyway we eventually split up which wasnt an amicable breakup. However sometime later at TOTS I met this Girl an we started stepping out together. All is going well we get along and eventually she invites me back to her new flat she has just moved into to. At this point she has told me she has a sister of course, but I take it in the flow of chat.

So on our second or third date she invites me back to hers....The place is empty . We eventually make it to the bedroom , I spend the night . We are at it like Rabbits all night ..Next Morning she is up and about long b4 me..and I hear voices coming from I guess the Kitchen. Both of which I recognised...The debate is ...Oh who have you brought home and slept with, I heard you at it like cats and dogs when I came in .....Panic stricken I looked around for clothes to escape in ........To late In walks MY current Lady followed closely behind by her sister .What made it worse was my current lady was about 5 years younger.than the ex.....Now if ever the Term ... "I want the ground to open Up" is Apt......That was that moment .:eek:

Quality mate.
Another top post from the archives of Cricko!

 

[blues_r_best]

I still speak to the older Sister these days ..and she still brings it up.

Too much info there Cricko...

 

[DTS]

Just thought of another.

I was dating my long term bird who was great. Got on really well with her brother who despite being a Man Utd plastic fan was a great bloke. He had a bird called Emma who was fit.

One day all four of us went to my birds aunties in this massive house in Bishop Storford. Lovely place with a massive pool. It was a red hot summers day.

My bird was doing the family thing talking with all her boring American;s cousins. I got stuck with some bloke called Chip who was a mortgage broker in America and wanted to spend hour after hour comparing and contrasting the differences in the way things work here to there.

Then my saviour Emma my birds brothers bird asked me if I wanted a swim. Of course I said yes as she was FIT. Anyway had a swim and threw some frisbie and that was it really. Both got out and fell asleep on a sunbed.

Woke up a hour or so later and roll over. As my eyes opened I looked up and realised that Emma,s bikini bottoms had somehow got entangled in her flange. This exposed I would say about 75% of her well shaven growler.

I know at this stage i should have told her but hey she was asleep so it was rude not too look.

About an hour passed and I was still looking like my life depended on it. All the sudden my bird shouted out to us both to come in. Emma woke up and I pretended to be asleep to avoid her embarrasment.

Come on Dave she said - Lets go in. It was at this point that I realised I had the biggest boner of my life. I said to Emma I would follow her in but she said she would wait. I was nowhere near a towel or any garment to hide my embarrasment.

I got up and then did the worst Karl Duguid dive I have ever seen into the pool to hide my member. Emma very kindly got me a fresh towel and we never spoke of this moment since.

I split with the bird of my dreams in November last year. At the same time Emma split with my ex birds brother. I keep trying to bump into her to this date but as yet I have had no luck.

DtS :guns:

 

[Cricko2]

Was that "Bump" or Hump into her Dave:D

 

[Napster]

Just thought of another.

I was dating my long term bird who was great. Got on really well with her brother who despite being a Man Utd plastic fan was a great bird.

Eh? :thump: :D You didn't, did you?

 

[Cricko2]

Beggars can't be choosers Naps;)

 

[DTS]

:fury:

Eh? :thump: :D You didn't, did you?

Good spot - Edited now to avoid looking like a homosexual.

 

[C C Csiders]

Come on Dave she said - Lets go in. It was at this point that I realised I had the biggest boner of my life. I said to Emma I would follow her in but she said she would wait. I was nowhere near a towel or any garment to hide my embarrasment.

I got up and then did the worst Karl Duguid dive I have ever seen into the pool to hide my member.

So let's get this straight: you get an erection and the first person you think of is Karl Duguid?:eek:

 

[andrew_sthnd]

When I started uni last year me and my flat decided before a night out we would try making some cocktails. Anyway, off we trotted to town to get something to mix the drinks in. We walked into a shop in the town centre and thinking it would be quicker to ask than search for the items I walked up to one of the shop assistants and promptly said:

"Excuse me, Have you got any big jugs?"
to which she replied: "No love, but she has quite large ones!" (pointing at another assisstant)

The end result - a red faced me and lots of **** taking from my mates!

 

[Cricko2]

Must of been a shallow pool:)

 

[Interpol Shrimper]

This exposed I would say about 75% of her well shaven growler

I am beginning to wonder if this is a generational thing.
Other than my 1st serious g/f and a couple of dirty old scrubbers along the way, hardly any of the women I've "known" have gone for the full shave. They mostly kept it tidy but never the real deal. In fact, I can think of nothing more minging than an unkempt "lady-garden" :minger:

Maybe there's a Friday poll in that statement Dave my boy?

 

[Cricko2]

I am beginning to wonder if this is a generational thing.
Other than my 1st serious g/f and a couple of dirty old scrubbers along the way, hardly any of the women I've "known" have gone for the full shave. They mostly kept it tidy but never the real deal. In fact, I can think of nothing more minging than an unkempt "lady-garden" :minger:

Maybe there's a Friday poll in that statement Dave my boy?

Now there is another story Richard.:p