Southend Useless XI

[DTS]

Morning All,

Ok your all time most useless Blues XI's ever please. The sort of bunch that would be relegated beyond belief if they ever got together. No one game youth team wonders please with the exception of Rio Alderton who for his performance at Macclesfield will forever live in the memory.

GK - Mark Prudhoe

DF - Martyn Booty
DF - Dave Morley
DF - Andy Dixon
DF - Andy Harris

MD - Brett Darby
MD - Gordon Connelly
MD - Leon Johnson - (Did well in fairness)


AT - Drewe Broughton
AT - Jason Harris
AT - Danny Webb

Manager - Alvin Martin


Can anyone do worse tha this....

 

[dashman]

Zaboub? Foran lol!?

 

[MK Shrimper]

D***e? Wash your mouth out!

 

[Firestorm]

John Keeley
Mark Hone
Steve Hatter
Tom Jordan
Frank Lampard
Gordon Connely
Jason Cook
Simon Livett
Mario Walsh
Trevor Whymark
Richard Young



*goes for a lie down*

 

[Yorkshire Blue]

Manager Alvin Martin

GK Wyan Wobinson
RB Andy Harris
LB Keith Dublin (c)
CB Ben Lewis
CB Mark Warren
RM Scott Ashenden
CM George Parris
CM Rio Alderton
LM Brett Darby
CF Drewe Broughton (vc)
CF Neville Roach

I'm claiming George Parris under the Rio Alderton exemption because he was _that_ bad and he wasn't a youth teamer. If you disqualify him I'll go for Derek Payne in midfield.

 

[Napster]

Alvin Martin Manager

Neville Southall
Warren May
Dave Morley
Keith Dublin
Mark Hone
Gordon Connelly
Gareth Risbridger
Carl Hutchings
Frank Lampard
Richard Young
Tony Richards

 

[DTS]

Alvin Martin Manager

Neville Southall
Warren May
Dave Morley
Keith Dublin
Mark Hone
Gordon Connelly
Gareth Risbridger
Carl Hutchings
Frank Lampard
Richard Young
Tony Richards

How did I forget Hone?:'(

Risbridger was a bit harsh - he only played once and he ran about a lot.....

 

[Rusty Shackleford]

Manager Alvin Martin

GK Wyan Wobinson
RB Andy Harris
LB Keith Dublin (c)
CB Ben Lewis
CB Mark Warren
RM Scott Ashenden
CM George Parris
CM Rio Alderton
LM Brett Darby
CF Drewe Broughton (vc)
CF Neville Roach

I'm claiming George Parris under the Rio Alderton exemption because he was _that_ bad and he wasn't a youth teamer. If you disqualify him I'll go for Derek Payne in midfield.

I can't agree with your assessment of Derek Payne - I thought he was a serviceable midfielder with a wicked straight right. As for Keithie Dublin, I think we've already debated that one to death.

 

[DTS]

Agreed I think Dublin is harsh actually. He wasnt good but he wasnt usless either....

 

[Rattus Norvegicus]

Yes, I'm not sure about Dublin being included.

There was some goalie that was brought in and the rumour was that he was the girlfriend of the new manager's daughter. It could have been late 90's or early this century - it must have been 4th division stuff.

Remember seeing a young lad called White play at Wigan (old ground - before they had all the money) and at Roots Hall I think - clearly had some talent but was struggled badly on the pitch to the extent that he would run forward but forget to take the ball with him ..........:blush:

Zaboub was poor ......... and a player I never warmed to - Barry Conlon. And in more recent times, Billy Paynter didn't exactly show that he was an England under 21 player ........ and that brings me on to Matt Harrold ......

 

[Firestorm]

Yes, I'm not sure about Dublin being included.

There was some goalie that was brought in and the rumour was that he was the girlfriend of the new manager's daughter. It could have been late 90's or early this century - it must have been 4th division stuff.

Remember seeing a young lad called White play at Wigan (old ground - before they had all the money) and at Roots Hall I think - clearly had some talent but was struggled badly on the pitch to the extent that he would run forward but forget to take the ball with him ..........:blush:

Zaboub was poor ......... and a player I never warmed to - Barry Conlon. And in more recent times, Billy Paynter didn't exactly show that he was an England under 21 player ........ and that brings me on to Matt Harrold ......

Emberson was linked with Wignalls daughter IIRC

 

[Rattus Norvegicus]

Thank you - yes, Emberson - poor, very poor indeed. :thumbdown:

 

[davewebbsbrain]

This has Gary Poole written all over it

 

[Blueshrimper]

Graeme Jones is always worthy of a place in these teams. Don't think anybody who went to Rushden away will ever forget that penalty. Dom Foley was pretty abysmal though.

 

[canveyshrimper]

John Keeley
Mark Hone
Steve Hatter
Tom Jordan
Frank Lampard
Gordon Connely
Jason Cook
Simon Livett
Mario Walsh
Trevor Whymark
Richard Young



*goes for a lie down*

This, although Chris Turner was quite hapless, and I'd have Drewe on the bench to show Whymark how to turn. Add Dick Bate as manager, and you've got a pretty hopeless bunch.

 

[DTS]

Lampard Senior before my time. Was he just past his best as I assume he was a tidy player in his day?

 

[BARNETBLUE]

Certainly was DTS..played a lot for the Hammsters, only saw him once or twice for us; recall Peterborough away.Lampard Junior has obviously surpassed his old man nowadays, but originally thought his Dad was a better footballer myself

 

[canveyshrimper]

Never really rated Lampard senior, but his career stats are pretty good at the highest level. However he was crap and a crock by the time he arrived at Roots Hall.

 

[Norwichshrimper]

People...we need to work harder on this.
I'm not happy about including Prudhoe, Southall, Lampard and Whymark...they weren't bad players, they were just rubbish when they reached us.
Equally there are a lot of names like Warren, Dublin, Paynter, Cook etc..OK they weren't very good...but we need players who were just **** full stop.

I would like to put forward

Graeme Jones
Neville Roach
Andy Harris
Carl Hutchings
I'm now going to go and think of some crap midfielders..........

 

[dan_mays]

afternoon all,

GK - C.Emberson
DR - M.Booty
DC - D.Morley
DC- M. warren
DL - C.Wilson
MR - G.Connelly
MC - S.Livett
MC - A.Bouzid
ML - T. Black
St - D. Webb
St - N. Campbell

Bench

GK - Prudhoe
D - Harris
M - Hutchings
M - Zauboub
F - Paynter
F - Roach