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desert

  1. DTS

    Question Standing or sitting tonight?

    If you going to Brentford where will you be? Personally myself and Desert Shrimper or whatever name he is this week are on the terraces.

  2. Your Jokes, Strictly for the Pub only.

    A Boy walks into his parents bedroom and see's his dad having sex with his mum. ''What are you doing ?'' ''Making you a brother or sister!'' His dad replies. ''Do her doggy style, I want a puppy.'' Joe is on his last day at work as a postman. He receives many thank-you cards and monetary...
  3. DTS

    Question Worst gift (wedding or otherwise) ever recieved.

    Without wanting to mention it again obviously Mrs DtS (The lucky biatch) and I got married just over a week ago. Wedding lists are always a thorney issue. However Mrs DtS and I decided that we would ask for cash for anyone that wanted to kindly give us something. At first we felt a little...
    • DTS
    • Thread
    • brough desert dts ead hanks
    • Replies: 37
    • Forum: Homer's Bar
  4. DTS

    Question Should you always bring food/drink to a gathering

    Last night Mrs Dts and I hosted a BBQ for Mrs DtS friend who is a girl (Thought best not say girl friend or I will get all the Brighton jokes) and her fella. So the girls can discuss table plans. Really like her fella. Good lad who likes a beer. Mrs DtS mate is a good girl, massive set and...
    • DTS
    • Thread
    • bbq brough declares desert dts meat mortgage owning sausages token
    • Replies: 39
    • Forum: Homer's Bar
  5. Napster

    Heat 1 Round 6 - Chris Eubank v William Shakespeare

    Chris Eubank - Desert Shrimper v Matt the Shrimp - William Shakespeare The boxer, versus the writer. Now, Desert Shrimper is away, so I will fight his corner.
  6. BLUEBLOOD

    Round 1: Heat 13: Leftism vs Sgt. Pepper

    Day 4 gets underway sometime later than usual with Desert Shrimpers Leftism by Leftfield sure to be thrashed by one of the most definitive albums of all time, Ayrshire Blues pick Sgt. Peppers Lonely Hearts Club Band
  7. BLUEBLOOD

    First Round Draw

    Right, welcome to Southchurch where the draw has just taken place for the first round .. these are listed along with the dates match ups are to take place Wednesday 25th February RADIOHEAD - OK COMPUTER (Pubey) vs THE BEATLES - THE WHITE ALBUM (Bobby Greenberg) NEW ORDER - TECHNIQUE (Mad...
    • BLUEBLOOD
    • Thread
    • beatles brettie angell canveyshrimper cyril desert firestorm moon naps nirvana oldbluelady outta primal pringlejon rope roses screamadelica steveo
    • Replies: 34
    • Forum: Homer's Bar
  8. Aberdeen Shrimper

    Happy Birthday

    Happy Birthday Desert Shrimper :clap:
  9. Uncle Leo

    Just one letter of the alphabet....

    Bit of a twist on Desert Island Discs here. You're stuck on the proverbial desert island, but can only take music by artists all beginning with the same letter. So if you go for 'Q' that'd be, for example, Queen, Queens of the Stone Age, Queensryche and, erm, Eoghan Quigg. You're also limited...
    • Uncle Leo
    • Thread
    • artists beatles bjork blur bowie desert discs ish music roses
    • Replies: 24
    • Forum: Homer's Bar
  10. Aberdeen Shrimper

    Lightning Bolt, One Night and and Desert Island

    May have been done if various ways but have not seen it. Its Always good for a Thread. Question is....If you had to, who would you want 1. To spend 1 day and Evening with and Why? 2. To send a Lightning Bolt on to and why? 3. Have as your soul companion on a Desert Island for a year and Why...
  11. Stats

    Battle Of The Tools - Prelim 10

    Sorry for the delay people, lead up to xmas rather busy and trying to sort out a job as well. Anyway without further delay we have the last Prelim match today between checkout king Dale Winton (Canvey Shrimper) and Ginger Spice Geri Halliwell (Desert Shrimper). Has Winton's checkout beeped too...
  12. Stats

    Battle of the tools - prelim draw

    People of the Zone, We had a wonderful 42 entrants for SZone Tool Of The Year which means we need 10 Prelim Round Matches. Draw list and numbers as follows; Jamie Oliver - MrBeard - 1 Russell Brand - Hutton - 2 Jade Goody - Jonny Stokes - 3 Gordon Brown - Fat Shrimp - 4 Pete Doherty - Dave -...
    • Stats
    • Thread
    • bra bushell clarkson clifford cyril desert elton fasto fauntleroy foo hall hut norton prelim qui ran rants ski steveo tarquin tools whoever
    • Replies: 19
    • Forum: Homer's Bar
  13. Stats

    Battle Of The Tools

    Yes thats right people we've had battle of the fit babes, battle of the sitcoms, battle of the horror movies but now its time for BATTLE OF THE TOOLS Your chance to have your say on who you think is the most annoying waste of space in modern society. As previous please put your nominations...
    • Stats
    • Thread
    • bra bushell chocolate clarkson clifford cup desert elton fa cup hut kerry maggie norton sitcoms ski tarquin tools trophy vanessa
    • Replies: 116
    • Forum: Homer's Bar
  14. Aberdeen Shrimper

    Can anyone help???

    I need to purchase one of these outfits pretty sharpish, anyone know where i can get one. :unsure:
  15. Slipperduke

    West Sham

    Sometimes in life, when faced with inexplicable stupidity, there is a temptation to assume that perhaps it is you who is being stupid. When Steve McClaren decided to play long-ball to Michael Owen and Wayne Rooney in Russia last year, I briefly toyed with the theory that maybe, with his years of...
    • Slipperduke
    • Thread
    • ant assume briefly chief claimed desert didn faced faul hanks kiss league qui recruitment reportedly revealing sears similar spine stupidity trademark wouldn youth
    • Replies: 23
    • Forum: The Big Dady's General Football Forum
  16. Harold Bishop Killer

    Midweek Funnies

    There are two Mexicans who have been lost in the desert for weeks, and they're at death's door. As they stumble on, hoping for salvation in the form of an oasis or something similar, they suddenly spy, through the heat haze, a tree, off in the distance. As they get closer, they can see that...
    • Harold Bishop Killer
    • Thread
    • afford bacon collected damned declares desert juicy money mortgage oasis package pension pulling rounds similar sticking thieving touched wakes wallet worker
    • Replies: 0
    • Forum: Homer's Bar
  17. BLUEBLOOD

    Taylor vs Wade ... Part 3

    Tomorrow night Phil Taylor (who beat Dennis Priestley 17-8) and James Wade (who slaughtered Wayne (Kerr) Mardle 17-5) meet in the final of the World Matchplay Championship ... basically the 2nd most prestigious tournament in darts It'll be the 3rd time they've met in a televised final this...
  18. OldBlueLady

    Apple trees

    Bit random this, but thought I'd just see if anyone's had the same problem with their apple trees as us? Had loads of blossom and plenty of fruit form all hunky dory and just as usual, have had no trouble at all with aphids this year (normally a major pest) but nearly all the fruit has dropped...
  19. Harold Bishop Killer

    If The World Was A Village Of A 1000 People

    If we could reduce the world’s population to a village of precisely 100 people, with all existing human ratios remaining the same, the demographics would look something like this: The village would have 60 Asians, 14 Africans, 12 Europeans, 8 Latin Americans, 5 from the USA and Canada...
    • Harold Bishop Killer
    • Thread
    • aids anxiety birth categories christians deaths desert drought electricity europeans ios itself languages materials muslims nuclear produces reduce religious richer riches supply teachers weapons wells
    • Replies: 16
    • Forum: Homer's Bar
  20. steveo

    Local boy on Sky

    Southend boy, Steve Maish, playing Peter Manley imn the Las Vegas desert classic shortly on Sky Sports.
    • steveo
    • Thread
    • desert ley sky sports sports
    • Replies: 6
    • Forum: Homer's Bar
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