Applying for the Met?

[Ricey]

F*ck it, go the whole hog, buy a Burkha and go as a Female, Lesbian Muslim in a Wheelchair.

Cover your bases.

LOL! I will give it a try, but if I get found out I think I might end up doing some serious time for it.

 

[davewebbsbrain]

I have been informed of a recruitment drive by the Met Police and am going to ring up tomorrow and book in for one of their open days. The reason I am starting this thread is to ask a bit of advice.

I would love to join the Police and it has been a dream of mine for a while, I would love to get into C.I.D or be part of the Air Support Unit. But with the way things are these days, they seem to only want certain people such as ethnic minorities basically different from english white straight males.

So do I put on the form that I am a homosexual (And yes people believe it or not I am not actually gay)?

Do you think it will help my case?

Y.M.C.A eat your heart out...Do you also want to be a Red Indian..

Matt, you are gayer than a bag of gay things!!

 

[Bazza the dog]

If you really want to join the force then just state the following and you will be laughing all the way to Inspector in no time.

1. I was bullied at school and see this as the ideal opportunity to get my own back on all.

2. I have no personality, charm or common sense whatsoever and enjoy tugging people for the most minor offences, especially people who are weak or can't really defend themselves.

3. I will always be a copper and on duty, even if my family or friends commit the mildest of crimes I wil have them over anyway and take great pleasure in doing so.

4. I am a person who has total double standards, not prone to vile crimes or bending the law to help me in anyway..

5. Most of my peers at school hated me and most of the teachers too, I fell this is the ideal opportunity to get my revenge on them because I am a right horrible bit of work.

Good luck.

 

[Southminster_Shrimper]

Do you just want to get your hands on a policemans helmet and call it your own?

 

[DTS]

Ricey,

My tip is never lie if you can help it (Unless its to bed a woman) as it may come back to bite you. If the senior recruitment officer is also a stuffer....sorry thas not very PC is it...A shirtlifter he may want your chocolate starfish as a prize if you are to get in.

 

[DTS]

Was also wondering if anyone has any mates that have had an success with it?

Yes mate I have...

My mate Big Tony once pretended to be a woman to get a job as a lap dancer in a dancing club. He got the job and has been there six years now. He said the interview did get a bit hairy when he had to flash his growler in the interview but he managed to fold his penis inbetween his legs and make it look like a muff.

He now uses a pair of Gazza (Italia 90 edition) fake plastic boobs and to this day has not been rumbled . He is making serious money and gets to meet loads of birds so it can work mate. I voted yes go for it.

Just check they arent going to put you in an all gay dorm at Hendon.

 

[TrueBlue]

Always knew you were filth