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sausage

  1. Best Toasted Sandwich Filling

    One of the perks of being unemployed at the moment is, at lunch, which does tend to be my first meal of the day, I have a license to go nuts and experiment with the Toasted Sandwich Maker I have that served me so well at Uni... It's been great to me in the past, but today it exceeded itself in...
    • EastStandBlue
    • Thread
    • anytime executed experiment filling itself perks sandwiches sausage unemployed
    • Replies: 57
    • Forum: Homer's Bar
  2. Ulysses

    Banksy Sex Act Sausage

    Ok i'm ****ing weirded out, can't find it on you tube but its been on the BBC 2nite. http://www.flickr.com/photos/omnivoroustraveler/2979878965/ He is bloody genius. Still reckon its Damien Hirst though.
  3. canveyshrimper

    Sausages

    IRISH SAUSAGES Shamus and Murphy fancied a pint or two but didn't have a lot of money between them, they could only raise the staggering sum of one Euro. Murphy said 'Hang on, I have an idea.' He went next door to the butcher's shop and came out with one large sausage. Shamus said 'Are you...

  4. Another joke.. (Contains sexual content)

    Paddy & Jimmy need a drink. They pool their money but only have 50p . Paddy takes the cash in the butchers and buys a sausage. They go into a bar, order 2 pints and down them. Before the barman asks for the cash Paddy puts the sausage between his flies and Jimmy sucks it! The barman throws them...
  5. OldBlueLady

    I'm a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here!

    So, new series kicked off last night, Nicola McLean almost fell out of her t-shirt at the meet and greet before they went their seperate ways. The group was split into two teams reds and yellows - who became inhabitants of "home" and "away" camp respectively as a result of Joe Swash beating...
    • OldBlueLady
    • Thread
    • beds chief gays jungle qui ran sausage seperate shirt spock squeamish
    • Replies: 293
    • Forum: Homer's Bar
  6. Irish_Shrimper

    Interview with an Exile: Part 3 - Canada Shrimper

    This week, John from Canada takes part in the interview with an exile chat. The following picture is from his latest trip over to Southend for the Swindon game: 1) How long have you been an exile? A) Been out of the country for 10 years less 8 months in the middle 2) Why did you...
    • Irish_Shrimper
    • Thread
    • afford ant anto benji booze brough builder charlotte cup dads eastwood fa cup failing following hanks hattrick hogg hong hut league ley liverpool osborne paul clark sammy sandwiches sarah sausage shirt shoes spread tilly toss town trademark travels triple walsh wasn wish wore
    • Replies: 25
    • Forum: Homer's Bar
  7. IloveShrimp

    Fossets Farm What I Don't Want!

    Just got back from Twickers to see the rugby. The atmosphere around the ground (outside) was very relaxed with a real family feeling; which I thought was great, but inside there was no atmosphere at all. Yes it was great that it was possible for beer and other refreshments to be taken to...
  8. Desert Shrimper

    Sporting Double Entendres

    1. Pat Glenn, weightlifting commentator - "And this is Gregoriava from Bulgaria. I saw her snatch this morning and it was amazing!" 2. New Zealand Rugby Commentator - "Andrew Mehrtens loves it when Daryl Gibson comes inside of him." 3. Ted Walsh - Horse Racing Commentator - "This is really...
    • Desert Shrimper
    • Thread
    • anchor bbc didn dre ish lifting oxford rugby sausage sky sports snatch sports walsh
    • Replies: 10
    • Forum: Homer's Bar
  9. DTS

    Timeless Foods.

    Both Ben and I are starving so I have sent the useless lump over to the bakery for a cheeky mid-morning sausage roll. It has just dawned upon us that a sausage roll can be eaten at anytime of the day without raising any questions. Eg Its good as a breakfast snack or a late night stroll home...
    • DTS
    • Thread
    • anytime claimed daw eaten sausage
    • Replies: 47
    • Forum: Homer's Bar

  10. How many sexual partners you've had

    Just curious, totally anonymous. Nothing less that hiding the sausage in the temple of love please.
  11. chadded

    Vodafone

    Are *****. I got ****ed up and lost my phone, and then 12 hours later cancel it when i get the opportunity to ring them. Blah blah blah, they assure me if someone has called the talking clock of new Zealand or such like, I wont have to pay for it. Low and behold, some sausage munching ****...
  12. Slipperduke

    Transfer Windows Are Rubbish

    I went shopping today. I bought 150 steaks, 200 eggs, enough cornflakes to swim in and enough milk to drown in. I bought half a vineyard of red wine, a circle of cheese as big as a tractor wheel and a box of ice-cream large enough to sink a ship. I also picked up 40 paperback books and a new...
    • Slipperduke
    • Thread
    • afterwards ant ban brough cos dealings flavour foo identified industry ive janaury jobs jury laden league prepared raspberry rubbish sausage shirt signatures sledgehammer sucked swim
    • Replies: 12
    • Forum: The Big Dady's General Football Forum
  13. DTS

    Trapped in my own trousers!

    I had the most unusual experience on my life last night. Went up to Forest with my boss (Larger stakeholder for you Naps) who is a really top bloke. He is a mad Forest fan but was really gracious in defeat. I was thinking of going up my coach and staying at my mate Dom's house in Southend but...
    • DTS
    • Thread
    • collapse cos costa crisps didn didnt diesel ell gracious indication ish larger meat metal naps pain potato sausage scissors stairs towels trapped
    • Replies: 5
    • Forum: Homer's Bar
  14. TrueBlue

    Outback Steak House

    Basildon Steakhouse Stuart Mc.Dougall & his team welcome you to their home in the Basildon Outback! Anybody been to the Steak House in Basildon opposite ASDA in Miles Gray Road?? Taking the Mrs there tonight so I wanted to give her some steak then slip her a sausage when I get home.... but...
  15. DTS

    Films that you really looked forward too but were total let downs.

    Yesterday after a spot of lunch with my mate "The Pilot" and our respective Mrs, Mrs DtS and I decided that we would get a DVD to rid ourselves of the bordem that is Sunday afternoon TV. I have been desperate to see Zodiac - A film a bout the San Francisco area Zodiac Killer dating back to the...
    • DTS
    • Thread
    • bin blockbuster bout copies dts ive san sausage teenage
    • Replies: 51
    • Forum: Homer's Bar
  16. DTS

    Boycott Greggs the Bakers !!

    In the past I have been a massive fan of Gregg's. Once a week Benny boy from work and I walk over the river for one of there lovely sausage rolls or a mouthwatering chicken pastie. That was until saturday when it all changed.............. Got to Manchester Victoria nice and early on the way to...
    • DTS
    • Thread
    • accent disgust grab lynch money sausage
    • Replies: 33
    • Forum: Homer's Bar

  17. Top 12 TV Double Entendres

    1. Pat Glenn, weightlifting commentator - "And this is Gregoriava from Bulgaria. I saw her snatch this morning and it was amazing!" 2. New Zealand Rugby Commentator - "Andrew Mehrtens loves it when Daryl Gibson comes inside of him." 3. Ted Walsh - Horse Racing Commentator - "This is really a...
    • Pubey
    • Thread
    • anchor bbc didn dre ish lifting oxford rugby sausage sky sports snatch sports walsh
    • Replies: 4
    • Forum: Homer's Bar
  18. DTS

    Are there any nice looking lesbians?

    Ben from work and I have just ventured over the bridge today as we wanted to go to Tesco's at lunch. The walk is about 10 mins each way but we dont mind. As I ate my Gregg's sausage roll Ben gave me the nudge and said those magical words "Lesbian". This is the sign for me to look up and watch...
    • DTS
    • Thread
    • hippy nudge sausage
    • Replies: 33
    • Forum: Homer's Bar
  19. Uncle Leo

    Five go mad in Sunderland. Or have a few beers anyway...

    Here's a review of Saturday in Sunderland, courtesy of Statski.... I think when the fixtures came out at the start of the season the away day trip to Sunderland ranked high upon peoples away games to do. One hell of a way to go for 90 minutes of football but seeing The Shrimpers playing in a...
    • Uncle Leo
    • Thread
    • applauded cas caused doll dru eating especially flowing foo fulop gas hall highlights joi knackered league liverpool locks lumps menu olly ops peoples prepared properly pulled qui rag sausage singing ski sole speedy superb suppor tilly town trek triple walls wording
    • Replies: 30
    • Forum: Shrimpers Chit-Chat

  20. HELP

    Staff Xmas bash last night, Mr McScriv's head is pounding and I need to get in tip top shape for Spurs tonight. Need some cures for a hangover, already polished off a MaccyD's Sausage and Egg McMuffin and drunk about 2ltr's of water but it hasn't helped. I open the floor to SZ...
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