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If Trafalgar was today..
Nelson: "Order the signal, Hardy!" Hardy: "Aye, aye sir." Nelson: "Hold on, that's not what I dictated to Flags. What's the meaning of this?" Hardy: "Sorry sir?" Nelson (reading aloud): "'England expects every person to do his or her duty, regardless of race, gender, sexual orientation...- A Century United
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- abolished admiral adverts ban compensation crow didn diversity frenchman gender kiss limb multicultural refuse religious rope signal steel trafalgar visual wouldn
- Replies: 5
- Forum: Homer's Bar
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Friday jokes
I see MFI are on the brink of collapse.. Very much like the wardrobes I bought from them. --- What do you call lesbians in a field full of dildos? Squatters. --- My father in law handed me a note on my wedding day saying, "Goods delivered are non-returnable." I handed it back and said...- toellandback
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- collapse crisps ead juicy mars walls
- Replies: 12
- Forum: Homer's Bar
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Recommend me a Chinese Restaurant
I had a table booked at the lovely Jade Palace in Wickford tonight, I have just called to confirm the booking and been told that they are starting their Christmas menu tonight which is not quite what we wanted. I have decided to go elsewhere now and was wondering if anyone could recommend me a...- Southend_Lady
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- buffet hanks qui
- Replies: 53
- Forum: Homer's Bar
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The 'Stan
First of all, I'm writing this from my perspective of the last six months, I'm no hero, but plenty of my collegues are. Hopefully no one will think I'm writing this is order to show off, or to earn rep. Indeed, please don't rep me for this at all. I realise I'm probably not the only serviceman...- chadded
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- afghanistan army bacon bang bombs capital cases ched chief claimed computers cooked cos crisps cycle deed delhi drills eaten engineers exactly explosion fecking hamilton hawking helmand heres hut imo inch intact ish isnt ive joi knowing luxury military officer para patrol phones political protein rag religion religious res rmp roadside rounds shared signal signals similar soldier specialists suppor supports tank tents test tinned toilets wasn weapons welfare wish wouldn
- Replies: 35
- Forum: Homer's Bar
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Photoshop People??
Hi people was wondering if you can help me we need a new badge made up for work with a new company taking over. One of the guys wanted me to see if I could do it. I said no but I know some people who might be able to help me out cause they are such a great bunch of people. ;) Right I want...- Ricey
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- ead exactly fitted qui
- Replies: 23
- Forum: TechnoZone
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Zone Update ShrimperZone Navigation Bar / Links
As many have noticed, the links in the Navigation bar have changed as part of the ShrimperZone site/forum integration. The following links (of which some were previously on the original nav-bar) have now been added to the Quick Links menu on the right: New Posts Subscribed Threads User...- South Bank Hank
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- following hanks patience
- Replies: 0
- Forum: Shrimpers Chit-Chat
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Pies or Hotdogs or Burgers??
What do you eat at a game if anything? or or- ldnfatso
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- assets
- Replies: 29
- Forum: Homer's Bar
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Actual Call Centre Conversations
Probably seen them before but made me laugh: Actual call centre conversations !!!!! Customer: 'I've been ringing 0800 2100 for two days and can't get through to enquiries, can you help?'. Operator: 'Where did you get that number from, sir?'. Customer: 'It was on the door to the...- scrounger
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- cables cleaning conversation hall huh manuals packing register spelling suing suppor support typing
- Replies: 5
- Forum: Homer's Bar
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Tiffins in Southend (near seafront)
anyone care to divulge any reviews of this place. Walk past it quite often, and am tempted to try, but would like to know what the Zone thinks... a) quality b) Price c) Menu range d) Atmosphere cheers Davros- Davros
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- qui
- Replies: 3
- Forum: Homer's Bar
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Liverpool Not Out Yet
Liverpool fans must be feeling numb by now. There's only so much bad news you can take before you end up rocking backwards and forwards in the corner of the room, dribbling on your shoes and the weekend defeat to Barnsley was the final straw for most long-suffering Reds. Never has there been...- Slipperduke
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- anfield carefully champions didn easier emirates fa cup gest gulf imagination ish league liverpool mancini narrow repeated runners shoes somewhere suffering test town wouldn
- Replies: 2
- Forum: The Big Dady's General Football Forum
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Computer says no!!!
The beloved switched on my P.C today and an error came up saying something like "A windows file is missing,system cannot start because of a corrupt file" or along thows lines. Any way it gave her the option to R to repair which she did and another menu came up giving her the option to resore...- Winkle
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- beloved ched disk installed mails powerpoint products restored stalled
- Replies: 16
- Forum: Homer's Bar
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The Most Bizarre Thread - Index (Pages 79-145)
THE BIZARRE THREAD – SUMMARY OF PAGES 79-145 Names key: Mr RG - BrettieAngel Mrs RG - Vange_Shrimper S_S - Me I_S - Irish Shrimper Huttons - SUFCHutton and Amy Special Announcement ·...- Southminster_Shrimper
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- arrives bbc brough burger ched compared cup discussed eating following ful fur graduation hills hut jcb jury matched meals posted postings qui reaching rock sarah speedy spells suffering suitable test wimpy wish
- Replies: 13
- Forum: Homer's Bar
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Southend United squad expressed as pizzas
Southend United squad expressed as pizzas through the latest takeaway menu numbers stuffed through my door Especially for glasgowsufc Darryl Flahavan - Cheese and Tomato Simon Francis - Farmhouse Che Wilson - Hawaiian Lewis Hunt - Classic Peter Clarke - Siciliana Adam Barrett - Beefeater Mark...- Yorkshire Blue
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- bbq meat takeaway tandoori
- Replies: 81
- Forum: Shrimpers Chit-Chat
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TRUE BLUE finds Kebab open at lunchtime for work!!!!
AHHH an office kebab being tucked away by myself this afternoon in the office! superb this shall now be a regular thing on the lunchtime menu for work! I give you the opening moment with TB and donner kebab with garlic mayo!!!- TrueBlue
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- finds kebab superb
- Replies: 36
- Forum: Homer's Bar
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The Goal Wall
Here's a football game for you to try. It's based on a regular feature of a long-running Saturday night sports show on German TV station ZDF. At the end of each week's show, they invite all their guests to have six shots at their goal wall, the Torwand. All the great and good of German football...- Southampton Shrimper
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- afford complicated easier foo meter postion sports tilly wish
- Replies: 7
- Forum: Homer's Bar
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The Bank letter :)
Following on from Sam's letter to the bank .....:p Dear Sir: I am writing to thank you for bouncing the cheque with which I endeavoured to pay my plumber last month. By my calculations, some three nanoseconds must have elapsed between his presenting the check, and the arrival in my account...- Cricko2
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- advised assets attitudes automated bedroom bra carefully caused copies cos dealings deposit dishonored establishment fiscal following fur guthrie mandatory mortgage music ongoing phone in refrain rethink twenty voice wish woody
- Replies: 0
- Forum: Homer's Bar
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Settle my lunch time debate.
Ben from work and I were having our daily lunch. We went to one of the many grotty non-english speaking cafe's in Borough High Street. Now I went for a semi-healthy Carbonara as I am remotely trying to be a bit sensible with my food. Ben is a big old lad and really does not care what he eats as...- DTS
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- grotty remotely
- Replies: 27
- Forum: Homer's Bar
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Five go mad in Sunderland. Or have a few beers anyway...
Here's a review of Saturday in Sunderland, courtesy of Statski.... I think when the fixtures came out at the start of the season the away day trip to Sunderland ranked high upon peoples away games to do. One hell of a way to go for 90 minutes of football but seeing The Shrimpers playing in a...- Uncle Leo
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- applauded cas caused doll dru eating especially flowing foo fulop gas hall highlights joi knackered league liverpool locks lumps olly ops peoples prepared properly pulled qui rag sausage singing ski sole speedy superb suppor tilly town trek triple walls wording
- Replies: 30
- Forum: Shrimpers Chit-Chat
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Play for your Club - IN THE PREMIERSHIP!
Just to reimind the Faithful that SUFC are now in the Premiership, and kick off is at 10:00am Premiership? We're 'avin a laff! As proved last week, every contribution is important, and please be careful to select Southend as your team, having been promoted PFYC will default to...- Shrimp in a Kilt
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- ant
- Replies: 43
- Forum: Homer's Bar
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URGENT FAO FREDHEIM
You need to accept my Hattrick Cup challenge urgently please. (under challenges on the menu) Deadline about 4.30pm UK time today otherwise I'm gonna have to fix another game up to ensure I get full training this week.- * ORM *
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- cup hattrick
- Replies: 4
- Forum: The Fantasy Sport Forum