Why Some Men Have Dogs And Not Wives:

[BLUEBLOOD]

1. The later you are, the more excited your dogs are to see you.

2. Dogs don't notice if you call them by another dog's name.

3. Dogs like it if you leave a lot of things on the floor.

4. A dog's parents never visit.

5. Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across.

6. You never have to wait for a dog; they're ready to go 24 hours a day.

7. Dogs find you amusing when you're drunk.

8. Dogs like to go hunting and fishing.

9. A dog will not wake you up at night to ask, "If I died, would you get another dog?"
10. If a dog has babies, you can put an ad in the paper and give them away.

11. A dog will let you put a studded collar on it without calling you a pervert.

12. If a dog smells another dog on you, they don't get mad. They just think it's interesting.

13. Dogs like to ride in the back of a pickup truck.

14. If a dog leaves, it won't take half of your stuff.

 

[Moridin]

Ha, love it :clap:

Not that it is just Dogs that are preferable to the ladies, Beer is also a lot nicer to deal with especially as.......


[FONT=ARIAL, VERDANA]1. Beer doesn't get jealous when you grab another beer.[/FONT]

[FONT=ARIAL, VERDANA]2. When you go to a bar you know you can always pick up a beer.[/FONT]

[FONT=ARIAL, VERDANA]3. A beer won't get upset if you come home and have beer on your breath.[/FONT]

[FONT=ARIAL, VERDANA]4. You don't have to wine and dine a beer.[/FONT]
[FONT=ARIAL, VERDANA]
[/FONT][FONT=ARIAL, VERDANA]5. If you pour a beer right you'll always get good head.[/FONT]
[FONT=ARIAL, VERDANA]
[/FONT][FONT=ARIAL, VERDANA]6. Hangovers go away.[/FONT]
[FONT=ARIAL, VERDANA]
[/FONT][FONT=ARIAL, VERDANA]7. You don't have to wash a beer before it tastes good.[/FONT]
[FONT=ARIAL, VERDANA]
[/FONT][FONT=ARIAL, VERDANA]8. A beer always goes down easy.[/FONT]

[FONT=ARIAL, VERDANA]9. You can share a beer with your friends.[/FONT]
[FONT=ARIAL, VERDANA]
[/FONT][FONT=ARIAL, VERDANA]10. Beer is always wet.[/FONT]

[FONT=ARIAL, VERDANA]11. You always know you are the first one to pop a beer.[/FONT]

[FONT=ARIAL, VERDANA]12. A frigid beer is a good beer.[/FONT]
[FONT=ARIAL, VERDANA]
[/FONT][FONT=ARIAL, VERDANA]13. You can have more than one beer and not feel guilty.[/FONT]
[FONT=ARIAL, VERDANA]
[/FONT][FONT=ARIAL, VERDANA]14. You can enjoy a beer all month long.[/FONT]

 

[toellandback]

I have read the first before but it still makes me smile, the second was new but very amusing. End of review :D

 

[please delete my account]

Afternoon Chaps,

I think another fundamental difference between a dog and the missus is that you can smear peanut butter anywhere on your body and the dog will always lick it off.

Also, in my experience, the dogs farts smell more pleasant..

Regards

 

[BLUEBLOOD]

I think another fundamental difference between a dog and the missus is that you can smear peanut butter anywhere on your body and the dog will always lick it off.

:D .. if anyone else had come out with that line everyone would just disregard it .. but when Tarquin says it you believe its true

 

[RobM]

...and why do dogs lick theire b*llocks? Because they can!

 

[BrettieAngell]

...and why do dogs lick theire b*llocks? Because they can!

its to take away the taste of their food!

 

[Alexis_SUFC]

:D .. if anyone else had come out with that line everyone would just disregard it .. but when Tarquin says it you believe its true

Really?? I would have thought that most people would be clever enought to realise that a very similar line was in 'Road Trip'.