Where do you draw the line?

[Andy_Shrimp]

I have been away for 4 months or so and came back last week. Was really looking forward to going to to the Peterborough game as I live less than 30 mins from their ground.

Anyway after getting back and seeing my children I get a call to take me away again - this time for a few days to "tidy things up" Of course I went as I had to (part of my initial contract) but I got home a few hours ago and I am now thinking this:

I can earn a decent living doing my consultancy work so why should I leave the country and miss all the things that matter to me. I work and save or invest for my kids but I have really had enough.

I don't want to go away again but the money is good. I have paid for my house (its in trust for the kids as I am divorced). I love my work but I can only see me earning abroad as that is where my expertise is needed.

So what do I do? Mates have said tonight to stay - but I never get work offered here.

 

[McNasty]

So the options appear to be :- Work abroad or no work at all. Unfortunately not much of a choice to me unless you have millions saved already.

 

[cockles is back]

I have been away for 4 months or so and came back last week. Was really looking forward to going to to the Peterborough game as I live less than 30 mins from their ground.

Anyway after getting back and seeing my children I get a call to take me away again - this time for a few days to "tidy things up" Of course I went as I had to (part of my initial contract) but I got home a few hours ago and I am now thinking this:

I can earn a decent living doing my consultancy work so why should I leave the country and miss all the things that matter to me. I work and save or invest for my kids but I have really had enough.

I don't want to go away again but the money is good. I have paid for my house (its in trust for the kids as I am divorced). I love my work but I can only see me earning abroad as that is where my expertise is needed.

So what do I do? Mates have said tonight to stay - but I never get work offered here.

train me up to do your job and i'll go

 

[OldBlueLady]

I'd have thought you go where the work is especially in the current climate - haven't I discussed this with you before or is this one of those deja vu moments? Earn your money while you're young, and try and have extended periods back home so you can still touch base, see family etc.

 

[steveo]

Do what makes you happier. Dont let money be your God.
In my book success equals happiness not wealth.

 

[Hotman]

Do what makes you happier. Dont let money be your God.
In my book success equals happiness not wealth.

Steveo has made a very good point.

Sound like you are in a pretty good position financially, so you need to balance up the value of an extra few ££'s against time and the benefits that come from it. If you are absolutely depending on the money then of course you need to go, but it doesn't seem as if it is as cut and dry as that.

Just remember one thing, you can never buy back the time with your family.

 

[Hotman]

Also can you not offer consultancy from a distance? Depends on the type of work you do, but my consultancy is offered nationwide and i only travel if there's a decent meal in it for me :)

 

[Andy_Shrimp]

I'd have thought you go where the work is especially in the current climate - haven't I discussed this with you before or is this one of those deja vu moments? Earn your money while you're young, and try and have extended periods back home so you can still touch base, see family etc.

Yes we have and the last stint was a real pain as I couldn't get back often enough which is what gets me. I really don't think its worth it

 

[Andy_Shrimp]

Steveo has made a very good point.

Sound like you are in a pretty good position financially, so you need to balance up the value of an extra few ££'s against time and the benefits that come from it. If you are absolutely depending on the money then of course you need to go, but it doesn't seem as if it is as cut and dry as that.

Just remember one thing, you can never buy back the time with your family.

It is a very good point and I am going to sit back and decide what to do over the next few weeks. Your final point is the one though - I can and never will get back that time and why should I miss out on any more.

 

[OldBlueLady]

Yes we have and the last stint was a real pain as I couldn't get back often enough which is what gets me. I really don't think its worth it

Glad I'm not losing my marbles just yet then! You have to do what is right for you, obviously and only you can decide that. Whatever any of us say on here, whether it's helpful or not, it's down to you in the end.

If you are fortunate enough to be able to call the shots and have extended time home written into your contract then don't be too quick to dismiss it. Carl's absolutely right about the time with your kids, but is that quality of time if you're not working at something you're obviously good at going to be as good as if you were away for long periods but then able to have really hands on concentrated time with them when you are home?

 

[Thorpe Groyney]

I believe everybody has their own different 'line' to draw between work and private life. I've tend to gone on the basis of asking myself the questions 'Do I want it?' and 'Do I need it?' as, even with spending time with your children, it sometimes more to do with you just wanting to see them rather than them needing to see you.

On one hand it's meant I've made terrible career decisions which has meant me scraping by and not earning anywhere near what my abiliities and experience should. On the other, though, I've had some truly fantastic times with my son and provided him with memories he'll have for the rest of his life - as well as me. I don't regret a second.

Perhaps thinking about what you want more, and then what you need more, then deciding after that if what you want is the most important factor or what you need. I get the impression, though, you already know what you're going to do. Above all - no regrets.